Just a bunch of Hocus Pocus.
At 1:30 in the morning, I'm watching my favorite Halloween movie of all time with two of the coolest people I know, while chowing down on the most addicting candy in the world (Snickers Minis, courtesy of the redhead). What more could I ask for on my birthday?
Paranoid much?
Eight years ago, I asked the Ouija Board a question that will forever haunt me. (If you know anything about this "psychic" game, you know that it should not be messed around with by little Christian girls.) My cousin, Amanda, and I had been attempting to scare one another with our most frightening ghost stories when she decided it would be fun to take our spooky rendezvous to the next level. Quietly, she crept to her closet and pulled out the controversial game from among the shelves. At first, being the scaredy-cat that I was, I refused to play. But eventually, curiosity got the best of me, and my fascination with the supernatural began to outweigh my fear. I agreed, under the condition that she went first. Amanda thought this was a reasonable request and proceeded to ask whether she was going to die within the next ten years. Both of us breathed a sigh of relief as the wooden object beneath our fingertips slowly made its way to the area marked "No."
Next was my turn. I specifically remember wanting to ask the Ouija if any spirits were in the room with us. For some reason, the idea of having an actual ghost present at our midnight fright-fest excited me. (Apparently, I was a very disturbed preteen.) But Amanda would not allow it; this was, in fact, the bedroom that she slept in every night, and she did not care to know about any invisible roommates that might have been lurking. Instead, for lack of a better question, I followed my cousin's lead by inquiring about my own death (a mistake, to say the least). "In how many years will I die?" was my bold inquiry. As the planchette began to move, I kept my eyes pinned to the board in anticipation of the response that I would receive. It seemed like several slow minutes had passed before the clear circle in the center fully encompassed the number eight—a good first digit, I thought, as I braced myself for the uncovering of the second. But I quickly realized, to my utter horror, that the planchette was no longer in motion—it had arrived at its answer. The demonic forces of the Ouija had spoken, and no amount of mental pleading was going to change that. My whole body froze as the reality of this terrible discovery began to sink in. At eleven years old, I was almost too curious, more than a little naive, and scared of absolutely everything. And, sadly, I was convinced that I was going to die at the young and lively age of nineteen.
Next was my turn. I specifically remember wanting to ask the Ouija if any spirits were in the room with us. For some reason, the idea of having an actual ghost present at our midnight fright-fest excited me. (Apparently, I was a very disturbed preteen.) But Amanda would not allow it; this was, in fact, the bedroom that she slept in every night, and she did not care to know about any invisible roommates that might have been lurking. Instead, for lack of a better question, I followed my cousin's lead by inquiring about my own death (a mistake, to say the least). "In how many years will I die?" was my bold inquiry. As the planchette began to move, I kept my eyes pinned to the board in anticipation of the response that I would receive. It seemed like several slow minutes had passed before the clear circle in the center fully encompassed the number eight—a good first digit, I thought, as I braced myself for the uncovering of the second. But I quickly realized, to my utter horror, that the planchette was no longer in motion—it had arrived at its answer. The demonic forces of the Ouija had spoken, and no amount of mental pleading was going to change that. My whole body froze as the reality of this terrible discovery began to sink in. At eleven years old, I was almost too curious, more than a little naive, and scared of absolutely everything. And, sadly, I was convinced that I was going to die at the young and lively age of nineteen.
You may be wondering if, after all these years, I still buy into the idea that my life will be cut short because of a ridiculous game. Well, I'm pretty sure you can answer that one for yourself. To be honest, the thought of such a silly prediction coming true amuses me to the point of laughter. But for whatever reason, this childhood memory has never completely left me; it lingers in my subconscious and is only brought to the forefront of my mind on the rarest occasions. Like tonight, for instance, on the eve of my 19th birthday. Let's just say, I'm determined to make it to the big two-oh.
On beauty.
As women, we have a natural desire to feel beautiful. This longing was ingrained within us the moment that we were created by our loving Father, who fulfilled this desire in hopes that we would never forget how extraordinary we are. Females, by design, have been described in music, poetry, and historical texts as the most radiant and graceful creatures to ever step foot on this Earth. So why, then, have so many girls easily adopted the notion that they are unworthy of these praises? Why is the media telling them that they will never measure up, never completely embody what is beautiful? Like most things in this world, our perception of beauty has been distorted and manipulated to fit a certain criteria, placing harsh limitations on something that was originally destined for each of us. And as a result, we cannot help but fall short time and time again of what society has deemed "beautiful."
We forever envy the bodies of others and never fully appreciate our own. I'll be satisfied once I lose a few pounds. If only I had a clearer complexion and a smaller nose. I would kill for her bone structure. What exactly are we fighting for? The approval of others, a man's love, our own self-worth?But the longing continues, and gratification does not come. Maybe for an instant, here and there...
a new haircut,
a smaller jean size,
a compliment received.
These small "improvements" can instill a spark of confidence in our hearts, but it isn't long before the self-assurance has faded and we are back to step one. Despite what our personality, beliefs, and accomplishments say about us, we begin to define ourselves by the reflection in the mirror and the number on our scale. Makeup very rarely leaves our faces for fear that people will see how we appear underneath the facade. Ugly. Flawed. Displeasing. Magazine ads, television shows, and even modern literature paint a picture of "the ideal woman" inside of our heads. We imagine her as the best version of ourselves and vow to become no less.
Striving, competing, struggling.
But the truth is, we will never become this imaginary girl, so lovely and perfect. Yet, sadly, some of us die trying. Take it from me, a girl who's been there—trapped in a battle against myself, yearning to be set free from the rules and regulations of society's take on beauty. After eighteen years, I'm finally beginning to come to terms with the unfortunate reality that the media lies to us all...and that what I see on the cover of Seventeen Magazine is not only unattainable (by even the model depicted), but is also a false representation of what it means to be beautiful. The masterminds behind this deceit would hate for us to realize the simple truth that beauty does not come in one form, one size, or one look. And contrary to popular belief, beauty does not equal perfection.
If you're someone who's had trouble accepting this, I hope you know that you are not alone. Please don't ever forget that you are lovely because of your flaws, not despite them. So then, what does it mean to be beautiful? I think that Audrey Hepburn sums it wonderfully: "The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It's the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows, and the beauty of a woman only grows with passing years."
Add it to my wish list.
I would very much like to own a pretty beach cruiser bicycle one day.
This beauty puts walking to shame.
Austin City Limits.
A nice advantage of having a brother that works in the music industry? He gets tons of free stuff...and then gives it to me. For example, Taylor Swift's second album—signed by the artist herself—that he surprised me with for Christmas two years ago. (She even wrote "To Emily" on the front cover! Talk about cool.) And just recently, he told me about a few ACL passes that he could get his hands on (with access to the Artists' Lounge). Which is perfect, now that I live in Austin. Sadly, Lance couldn't make it down for the weekend, but my cousin, Alyssa, was more than happy to accompany me to the music festival. She drove 6 hours from Louisiana to Austin on Thursday, bringing with her a delicious Funfetti cake that she so generously baked for us to share. I'm a lucky one, for sure.
[Funfetti cake + buttercream icing = my favorite. And don't you just love the frosted UT Longhorn? She's a domestic goddess, that one.]
After almost five hours spent shopping at the Barton Creek Square Mall on Friday, we headed over to Zilker Park for the first night of the festival, just in time to catch The Strokes play. (I must admit that I'm kind of lame when it comes to music. I didn't recognize about three quarters of the bands that were performing!)
On Saturday, we arrived pretty early to tour the park and find the Artists' Lounge, where we hung out most of the time in between performances. Free drinks, a comfy couch, perfect weather, music in the background, my camera in tow... As you can imagine, I was a happy camper.
We thoroughly enjoyed all of the bands that we saw, including Caitlin Rose, Lissie, Pete Yorn, Broken Bells, Matt And Kim, and M.I.A. Afterwards, I was so eager to add my new favorites to my iTunes library.
Unfortunately, Alyssa had to be back for work extremely early on Monday morning, and I had a massive amount of homework to do, so we decided not to attend the last day of the festival. (Of course, Switchfoot—the band that I was most excited about seeing—was scheduled for Sunday. Ugh.) Nevertheless, the weekend was pretty spectacular, thanks to Lula and Lancey-Pancey.
Getting a head start.
October is finally here! You know what that means... Halloween is right around the corner, and I cannot wait to begin the search for my costume. Even though I might wait a couple weeks to actually buy something, it's never too early to brainstorm! So I've been browsing the internet for ideas, and I've found several images that I like so far.
Have a look:
[Alice in Wonderland: a little uncanny but mostly cute.]
["The Absinthe Drinker" (by Félicien Rops): she is quite haunting, wouldn't you agree? And her dress fits the occasion perfectly.]
[Queen Guinevere: the bow and arrow makes this costume really appealing. Plus, the legend of King Arthur is so fascinating.]
[Lois Lane: a classic comic book character that I've always been a big fan of. Besides, I already have a camera glued to my hand.]
[Tarzan's Jane: simple, sweet, and a tad bit wild.]
It's a good start, I think. Do you have any ideas for your own costume? I would love to hear 'em!
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)









