A nagging truth.
Sometimes people are beautiful. Not in looks. Not in what they say. Just in what they are. | Markus Zusak, I am the Messenger
I recently watched Penelope, a film about a cursed girl who is born with the nose of a pig. By the hand of her aristocratic mother, she hides herself away from society for twenty-odd years, ashamed of what people will think of her unusual appearance. But then a young man—with plenty issues of his own—enters her life unexpectedly, and it isn't long before he begins to recognize and appreciate her unique beauty like no one else ever has. The quote by Zusak, although otherwise unrelated, sums up the heartwarming movie perfectly. And both have sent the wheels in my head spinning.
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"You don't think you're beautiful," he said to me, almost in the form of a question. The change in conversation caught me by surprise. No, I suppose I don't. But it made me wonder, is 'beautiful' the first adjective that comes to any girl's mind when she sees her reflection in a mirror or her image in a photograph? Maybe for a select few. But for most of us, I'm guessing, acceptance is key. I accept myself for who I am, beautiful or not. Some days, even this is a struggle.
Perhaps that's our curse: the tendency to settle on the acceptance of our flaws rather than the recognition of our beauty. What will it take for us to realize that our flaws are part of what make us beautiful? And even more, that there is beauty in who we are, regardless of the color of our eyes or the curves of our face?
As true as these statements are, it's much easier to say out loud than to believe in our hearts. It sits there on the surface, like a nagging parent's reminder: determined to be heard, but slow to sink in. So, what is it going to take? For Penelope, it isn't the approval of others that helps her believe in her own loveliness. It's not any one thing or any one moment in her life that changes her perspective on beauty or idea of herself. Rather, it is the culmination of everything that she has learned, felt, and experienced throughout those lonely twenty-something years that gives her the power to finally break the curse.
One day, one extraordinary day, it all just kind of clicks. She takes an honest look at herself and for the first time thinks, 'I am beautiful. I am enough.'
Searching for simplicity.
Being twenty-something in 2013 is both a blessing and a curse.
We have more freedom than generations before us could ever dream of. Our choices—of what we want to do, who we want to spend our time with, where we want to travel—are endless. If we work hard enough, we can do anything. That's what we're told, at least.
But at what point does it begin to be too much for us to handle? Does there ever come a breaking point?
All of the opportunities are exciting at first. We feel as if the sky is the limit, and the last thing we want to do is settle for ordinary. More goals, better goals. Striving to be a well-rounded person—cultured, accomplished, well-read, intelligent, multi-skilled, physically fit, and of course, well-balanced—for the sake of feeling worthy. Worthy of success, happiness, admiration, and self-respect.
The bounty of options that we carry around with us on a daily basis quickly becomes a heavy load to bear, and before long, we're stumbling beneath the weight of it all. Too many choices add to the clutter of our lives and breed indecisiveness; it becomes noise in the background, a distraction from something bigger.
What do I want my sole mission to be?
It's a sort of catch-22, this sense of freedom we have. Limits upset us, but limitlessness bogs us down. The best thing about this life is the very thing that can leave us feeling trapped.
At the beginning of the year, I made a pretty hefty list of resolutions for 2013, and it's growing every day. I keep several to-do lists, and I'm always looking for more projects to throw myself into... Which is probably why I never finish half of the things I start. My mind is constantly reeling, always in a state of restlessness. Interesting, challenging, fleeting, exhausting.
Sometimes, above all else, I crave simplicity. The choice to remove myself from all of the clutter. But I'm not even sure I'd know where to begin.
Being twenty-something in 2013 is both a blessing and a curse.
Because I need a coffee break.
Drinking: a Chocolate Coffee from Kerbey Lane Café. Just coffee, steamed chocolate milk, and whipped cream... So good on a cold day like today.
Loving: the fact that my reporting class is meeting at KLC for lunch today instead of having Wednesday lab. My professor couldn't be more awesome.
Reading: Four Days in November by Vincent Bugliosi, for my Kennedy Assassination class. Even though I'm not the biggest fan of nonfiction, it reads like a very detailed narrative. I think I like it so far. However, I still can't wait to dive into this novel, which has been sitting on my bedside table for the past few weeks. But I have exactly one month until my summer officially begins (and I can read whatever I want)!
Stressing over: I think the more appropriate question is, what am I not stressing over? Let's see... class presentation on Friday, my final news story, an English research paper, and class registration for the fall. April is going to fly by with all of this (and more) ahead of me.
Thankful for: long walks and good talks with close friends, coffee breaks, & having worthwhile things to keep me busy.
Listening to: "Wanted" by Hunter Hayes. It makes my heart melt every time.
Learning: to be patient, to be present in the everyday.
And a little bonus fun fact: I'm dying to travel. (Honestly, when has this not been the case?) Now that I'm approaching a whole year since I studied in the UK, I'm once again craving the adventure and excitement of exploring a new place. Perhaps this summer will present a few opportunities.
"Currently" post idea from Lovely Little Things.
Easter.
Every year, even during one of the most stressful months as a student (I'm looking at you, April), the mood surrounding the Easter holiday is always so peaceful. It's quiet and reflective, simple and slow. Good barbecue, lots of little ones, cool winds, family walks on farm roads, blackberry wine, and long naps were what this particular Easter was made of.
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